Baddingfield

I go to my cafe and you are there again.  Cyclists.  In hordes.  I just want breakfast for once without the view of your sweaty lycra covered figs.  Plus most of you are still fat anyway - just with really toned quads.  It must be all those hash browns and lattes you have after every ride……it’s counterproductive.  I don’t get it, Cyclists.  Drinking a milkshake while wearing roller-skates? Hot.  A beer in ski boots?  Yes please.  A long mac while looking like a brightly coloured, tightly covered cycla-borg? Ridiculous.

Your bike is worth more than my car.  My car has a cigarette lighter.  So it leads me to think - what does swimming cost?  Nothings….………Running?  The price of decent shoes.  “Yeah but feel how light it is,”  one says.  Who gives a fuck?

You’re just a bunch of yuppie toffs in aerodynamic sunglasses, high on life.  Get your own fucking cafe.